Dov Chayim ben Avraham Avienu v'Sarah Imenu

Baruch ata Adonai Eloheynu melech ha-olam,
shehehiyanu, vekiamanu, vehigianu lazman hazeh.

"Blessed are You, Ruler of the Universe, You have kept us alive, and sustained us, and enabled us to reach this moment." -The blessing of thanksgiving

I have the aching feeling that the next step I'm about to take in my life will not only totally wipe out whatever family I have now, but ensure that I never form one in the future. This, of all things, should make me feel anything but alone. But even someone as used to loneliness as I am can't help but feel utterly isolated from the entire world.

I've never met anyone who's done what I'm about to do. I've never even heard of anyone who's met someone. I have no one to ask for advice, no one to turn to. I must stand strong, I must become for myself the pillar and pedestal I always attempt to be for others.

I must be selfish in order to become totally selfless. I must covet and horde in order to be free of desire and need. There are indeed many paths through the woods. Mine simply does not yet exist.

None of you, and when I say this, I say it with absolute certainty, none of you agree with what I'm doing. Even so, if you remember me as a brother or as a comrade, please try to find it within yourself to support me. It is what I need to be complete.

It's what I need so my soul can come home.