Wings

"I have always kind of thought that the art of conversation was dead, but with you it's not."

"I still can't believe that I found someone as open and so completely...incredible as you. I am so glad that there is someone who is there to make me realize that life is meant to be lived."

"I hope things end up all right. All I can say is to take your own advice. It's some of the best I've ever heard."

"You are the one person who brings out the best me. I can truly like the part of me you bring out. I don't know how you do it, but somehow you just bring out every one of my good qualities and make me think harder about the person I want to be all of the time...not just some of the time."

"You are helping me find the person I want to become."

"You can come up with brilliant ideas that apply to the world outside your head and still retain the truth and purity of your heart and soul."

"You have this amazing connection with what is good in this world."

"You, however, are one of the first people I have ever met who has ever told me that. Maybe they think it, but you are not ashamed of letting the world know how you feel and what you believe. You should not be, either. Your thoughts are always so meaningful. Your words are always fuel for my own thoughts."

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Man, I'm so freaking stupid. This person thought the world of me, and believe me it was mutual. Her heart was the most loyal and pure of almost any that I've encountered in my entire life.

But basically I flipped out. She tried to be there for me and I wouldn't let her. When her life finally took a nosedive...well...I was nowhere near to even think about returning the favour.

Last I heard her life had gone to shit. She's married now, with a kid or not I don't know. I still hold inside of me all of her pure hopes and honest dreams, all of the drive and love that she held for the world that was betrayed time and time again.

I try to remember her when there was light in her eyes. I try to remember her before I became one of so many who demolished her.

It is the autumn and the breeze smells beautifully of leaves. The sun is setting behind her home, and the last of the crimson-gold lights bounce off of her red hair. She forgets for a moment that our gods are not the same gods and puts her hand on my chest.

Her eyes, the glowing green, transfix my entire being. The purity, free of any darkness, harbouring light and only light. I take her close, her head on my shoulder, and breathe in the scents of love. For one long, priceless moment, I am happy.

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"Thank you for everything you have ever done for me. I love you now and I always will. I'm so sorry that things couldn't work out between the both of us. I have to go now. It's getting late."

After that, I never heard from her again. That is probably the best thing I ever did for her, and it broke me day after day until at long last, I opened my eyes to find myself in the arms of Alpha.

And, well, we all know how that ended. I was given the same, cold dish that I had served out so long before.

I disgust myself.

Kathleen, keep your wings. The inferno may be waiting with open arms for me, but the heavens aren't ready for you to retire just yet.