Feasibility
A friend of mine of whom I have made no mention here in some years recently opened a martial arts school.
To rewind, I may have talked of this in passing as a dream of mine that I never saw as a feasible plan for a way to live out my days. My friend and I had talked about making our own school since we had barely started high school. We would be partners and combine our different styles to make something wholly new and more effective, and having fulfilled our dream, would be happy with work that we could take pride in.
Eight years later, he's now the owner of the fastest growing martial arts school in the nation, and I'm out of shape working at some corner in the mall.
It's hard not to let that make me feel retarded. Not that I envy him (I'm good enough at being content with not having to handle food) so much as the fact that I know I could've done the same thing. We were both world-class champions. Even though we'd always hold back, I never fell behind him when we sparred. I was perfect in form, flawless in weaponry, and in combat unrivaled by most. As was he.
What goes on in the life of one person that he is able to never lose sight of his single most precious ambition, and what happens to the other soul that he settles for choice number three or five or ten without a fight?
I should mention before I sound too negative how incredibly proud I am of this brother. It has always been utterly impossible to speak with him without leaving inspired, and it's largely because of him that I ventured into peaceful philosophy after my years of Nietzschean babble.
There's just something in me when he asks out of politeness what I've been doing in the meantime that feels like I have completely betrayed him in straying so easily from a path that he has never been able to leave.
I feel like I owe it to him to get back in the saddle, but really, I owe it to myself.
To rewind, I may have talked of this in passing as a dream of mine that I never saw as a feasible plan for a way to live out my days. My friend and I had talked about making our own school since we had barely started high school. We would be partners and combine our different styles to make something wholly new and more effective, and having fulfilled our dream, would be happy with work that we could take pride in.
Eight years later, he's now the owner of the fastest growing martial arts school in the nation, and I'm out of shape working at some corner in the mall.
It's hard not to let that make me feel retarded. Not that I envy him (I'm good enough at being content with not having to handle food) so much as the fact that I know I could've done the same thing. We were both world-class champions. Even though we'd always hold back, I never fell behind him when we sparred. I was perfect in form, flawless in weaponry, and in combat unrivaled by most. As was he.
What goes on in the life of one person that he is able to never lose sight of his single most precious ambition, and what happens to the other soul that he settles for choice number three or five or ten without a fight?
I should mention before I sound too negative how incredibly proud I am of this brother. It has always been utterly impossible to speak with him without leaving inspired, and it's largely because of him that I ventured into peaceful philosophy after my years of Nietzschean babble.
There's just something in me when he asks out of politeness what I've been doing in the meantime that feels like I have completely betrayed him in straying so easily from a path that he has never been able to leave.
I feel like I owe it to him to get back in the saddle, but really, I owe it to myself.
posted by red at 07:49
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